THE NURSE; A LITTLE GIRL’S HERO

BY: PAMELA JOY SMITH

 She was not even twelve years old but she was repeatedly being raped by her stepfather.  Her younger brother who discovered this did all he could to protect his older sister.  However, the stepfather beat both children, threatening worse acts if either reported the sexual abuse to the authorities.  My heart was heavy and sick as I continued to read that the mother knew about the sexual and physical abuse that her children were experiencing at the hands of her husband yet she did nothing to stop it.  Then came the day when the young girl discovered that she was pregnant.  Her mother and stepfather decided that she would have to get an abortion. The young girl’s mother drove her to the abortion clinic.

     After the abortion, the stepfather continued to violate the young girl and he regularly beat both the victim and her brother.  He also added mental abuse by chastising and ridiculing the young girl by calling her several unkind names.  He demanded that she start taking birth control pills as he accused her of having sex with all of the boys at school.  The poor child kept protesting that she did not have any relationships with anyone and she begged the stepfather to stop raping her. 

     Then it happened again, the young girl discovered that she was pregnant.  Once again her mother and stepfather decided she would have to have another abortion.  Her mother drove her to the same abortion clinic where her mother provided a false name for her daughter.

     That day as the nurse was preparing this young girl for the abortion, she realized that this child had had another abortion within the past year.  The nurse started to counsel the young girl and advised her that if she was going to be sexually active, that it was imperative that the young girl get on birth control pills.  It was too much for this precious child, she burst into tears and confided in the nurse about her dark secret and her fears.  That day, that nurse became her hero for life.  The nurse picked up the phone and called the authorities to report the sexual and physical abuse that this precious child and her brother had experienced at the hands of their stepfather and their own mother.

     This case was assigned to me and we did in fact achieve justice for the young girl and her brother.  This is yet another case of child abuse that pulls at the heartstrings. I never feel as if I can do enough for these children. I so wish that I had the power to erase their pain, experience and hurt.  Even though this case was one that I handled about 20 years ago, I still remember the children and I get so upset remembering what they had to experience at the hands of an abusive stepfather.  I will also never understand why a mother can stand by to allow this to happen to her children.  Children are the greatest gifts in life and they do not deserve to be mistreated or denied the protection parents should give them.

     If a child trusts you and tells you that they are being abused, please become their hero!  Too many children continue to suffer at the hands of their abusers because too many adults who are told of the abuse do not want to get involved.  Please realize that most of the states allow anonymous reporting.  All it takes is one phone call to help a child and become a hero for life.  We are their only hope as they are often threatened with more violence to themselves, their loved ones and even their pets if they report the abuse.  If they place their trust in adults whom they hope will help them, do not ignore their tiny voices for help!  Please do not ignore their cries for help. Step up to the plate and become their hero!

    Please join us at Whatafan.com in our crusade to blackout child abuse.  Together we can make a difference in a child’s life!

PHILLIP AND SUPERMAN

PHILLIP AND SUPERMAN

BY: PAMELA JOY SMITH

Studies show that ten percent of all child abuse cases include intentional burning. The two forms of intentional burning include immersion in which a child is forcibly placed in water that is too hot for the skin to bear and that of placing a hot object against the child’s skin such as a lit cigarette. Almost all of the reported deliberate burns occur to those children under ten years of age by their caregivers.

I read yet another case which had been assigned to me. I was horrified to read about the abuse that four year old Phillip had suffered at the hands of his stepfather. I remembered thinking when am I ever going to stop being shocked by what people do to children. I picked up the photos of Phillip and I was filled with sadness, and anger. How in the world could anyone do this to a vulnerable and precious child? I continued to read with horror to see that not only were these cigarette burns placed all over this child’s body but I also discovered that Phillip’s own mother had witnessed the abuse and had not reported it. The stepfather and mother maintained that Phillip had refused to wear mosquito repellent at a recent family picnic and as a result Phillip had been bitten by mosquitoes. In addition, they emphasized that he had scratched them to the point of infection.

As with all precious children who are the victims of these horrible crimes, my heart melted when I first met with Phillip. I was so impressed with this child. Although he had been tortured at the hands of his stepfather, Phillip had a quiet dignity that I have rarely seen in adults much less children. He was very matter of fact in his recounting what had caused all of the marks on his tiny body.

When this case went to trial, I remember being furious at a stepfather and mother who knew the truth and yet would subject a four year old to a trial. Phillip walked into the courtroom and climbed into the witness chair. I asked him questions about the marks on his body and what caused them. He very softly said his stepdad had placed a cigarette all over his body. I asked him if the cigarette had been lit. He told me yes. I asked him if anyone else had seen this happen, he quietly stated, “my mommy”.

During the defense case, the defense tried to maintain that Phillip was always misbehaving and he did not listen to his parents. The stepfather and mother both testified that Phillip was out of control and that he lied and had an over active imagination which included the fact that he would run through the house pretending he was superman. They tried to convince the jury that these marks on Phillip’s body were the results of infected mosquito bites.

I was so upset and furious with the attempts to belittle Phillip, that by closing argument time, my heart took over to deliver a very impassioned and indignant closing. I remember almost being in tears as I told the jury to look at the evidence and that the Doctor who was an expert in child abuse cases had stated that the pattern of the marks on Phillip’s body were consistent with deliberate cigarette burns which supported Phillip’s version of the facts. I also remarked that Phillip was trying to be a normal little boy which included dressing up as superman and doing what other four year olds do except I was sure that Phillip had hoped and prayed that superman or someone in the adult world would rescue him from this abuse. The Jury returned their verdict agreeing with Phillip and finally giving this tiny child justice just as only superman would have done.

I urge all of you to remember that although there is no superman in our world except on television, in movies and comic books, we have to help these abused children who need us to act as their superman and save them from the cycle of abuse. Wherever Phillip is today, I think of this brave little boy often and I will never forget him.

MISPLACED TRUST

MISPLACED TRUST

BY: Pamela Joy Smith

He was a well-respected Deacon of a local church. The congregation loved him and felt sorry for him as he had recently lost his wife and he had no children of his own. He lamented about how lonely life was without his beloved wife. The families trusted him completely and never questioned his intent when he approached several families and invited their young daughters to visit his house for a weekend. He stressed that he knew how hard the parents worked and he felt that they needed a break over the weekend so that the parents could spend time together while he watched their daughters. He also told them that he had a pool and he could take the girls to the movies. The overwhelmed and appreciative working parents agreed.

The Deacon instituted The Teddy Bear Club for all of the young ladies who would come and spend repeated weekends with him. The young girls enjoyed the many gifts that he lavishly bestowed upon them. The gifts included a teddy bear, jewelry and string bikinis. What the parents did not realize is that this beloved and trusted Deacon was taking photographs of their daughters while they slept posing them in various positions with their nightgowns pushed aside. The trusted Deacon was also touching the girls inappropriately at various times including while they slept. It appeared as if these crimes would go undetected until some of the girls started showing the signs of the onset of puberty. The cherished Deacon stopped extending weekend invitations to those girls.

The girls who were no longer welcomed at the Deacon’s during the weekend complained to their parents about some of the inappropriate touchings that had occurred while they spent time with the Deacon. The parents did not want to believe that their trusted Deacon could do anything to their daughters so they called a meeting with the Deacon. Of course the Deacon denied the allegations and protested that he was a lonely widower and because of certain health conditions, he was unable to have any sexual urges. The parents believed the Deacon and concluded that their daughters had misinterpreted what had happened. Surely a man of God would not do this to their daughters. So being reassured the parents sent the daughters who were invited back to the Deacon’s home every weekend.

Then the next group of girls was discharged from the Teddy Bear Club. Again a meeting was called with the Deacon and he once again denied the accusations. But while he was denying the girl’s charges, one of the girls climbed onto the Deacon’s lap and while engaged in his protestation of innocence, the Deacon’s hand disappeared under the young girl’s dress. The parents were shocked to silence but after the Deacon left, they reported their daughters’ allegations to law enforcement.

The investigation by the Sheriff’s Office led to the Deacon’s arrest. A search warrant conducted on his home revealed several dozen photographs of the girls as they slept with their nightgowns pushed aside. In addition, the girls had been posed in several positions. As a result of the investigation, the Deacon was convicted and sentenced to prison. Before he could serve a portion of his sentence, the Deacon died.

I urge all parents to believe your children if they tell you about inappropriate touching. It is very difficult for children to tell their parents of these acts as the children feel guilt or shame that this has happened to them. They also fear that they have done something wrong to have caused these actions. I also urge you to not give your trust so freely to others just because of their position in a church or in our society. Child Abusers are present in every walk of life. Although the parents in this case did everything they could do to investigate these allegations, please know that when confronted, an abuser will not readily admit to these crimes. Please keep in mind that your child’s trust in telling you should not be misplaced.